bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
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