Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
is wine microwaveable?
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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