What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
