it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question