how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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