If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Randomize
