Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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