Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
