Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
there was a trapeze. enough said
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
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