i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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