butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Randomize