You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
