I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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