its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
