im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
