Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Randomize
