So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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