i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize