come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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