I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
