He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
