i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
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