I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
