You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
Randomize