I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
