with your own penis?
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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