If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Everything about him screamed your future.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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