Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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