is your mom at the bar?
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize