Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize