If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
You're like the curious george of whores
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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