Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Randomize