my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
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