He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
