You're so nebulous sometimes
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
