I'm eating all of the evidence.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
