Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
