Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
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And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
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As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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