It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
