so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
