Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
