Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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