You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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