In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
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