Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
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at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
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