i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
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