That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.