i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
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