I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
