I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
