OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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