I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize